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Are We Not Men?

skinny Are We Not Men?

What does it mean to be a man?

(I’m bringing back footnotes — I like them and they let my mind wander a bit. Thanks for indulging me. Now back to the comedy and confusion that is my life.)

I was getting ready for a date the other day 1 and actually uttered these words while standing in my closet, “I hate my clothes.” I think I heard that on Sex and the City once when Miranda was going through one of her “down” times 2. Then, not ten minutes later I was checking my email and Mint had sent me two alerts:

Over budget this month on:



I was terrified to check my DVR assuming that the latest episode of The View would be on it complete with annoying, arguing rich women who still think the world is flat. That would be more than I could take.

I needed to cut a cord of wood or lift something heavy since growing a mustache or beard is out of the question given my ethnic make-up 3. Then it hit me, I could do the one thing that makes me feel like more of a man than anything else.

I grabbed Boy #1 off the Xbox, went outside, told him a few jokes and threw the football. He went “deep” and I let ‘er rip.

Because while we sometimes forget, being a dad is as close to manhood as you can get 4.

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  1. More on the weirdness and complexity of dating after 40 another time
  2. Has there ever been a more horrible character on TV?
  3. It would not be pretty and would like Cliff Claven when he tried to grow a beard on Cheers. The Wolfman!!
  4. Without growing massive facial hair or storming a hill
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